I have. And I’ve seen my clients experience it as well. Ronnie is a writer. She has been working hard to have her first novel . . . → Read More: What choice will you make?]]> Once on your path to your dream career, have you had the experience of feeling confronted with a choice to choose to follow your dream – or give it up?

I have. And I’ve seen my clients experience it as well. Ronnie is a writer. She has been working hard to have her first novel published. In the time that we have worked together she has embraced her dream of becoming a published writer, written her first draft of her first novel, worked with critique groups, written several other novels, and secured an agent. She is still not published. She has strong support from her agent, and has received positive feedback from editors and publishing houses. But she has not yet achieved the big dream.

Ronnie is an inspiration to me. She knows it is only a matter of time. I know this too. She’s right on the brink of her dream coming true. We both can sense it.

But along the way, Ronnie has had moments of discouragement, and disappointment. She has questioned whether she should just quit, and go back to other career. The one she grew to hate, the one she left behind.

She gets job offers on a regular basis. She has naysayers in her life who just don’t understand her commitment to her new life, her true dream. But she resists them. She has learned to say no to them. And yes to her dream.

When she has moments of doubt, she remembers that this is what she longs to do. This is her dream. Ronnie enjoys writing. She enjoys creating and telling stories. She’s good at it, and she knows it. Instead of quitting, she digs deeper, and continues to work on her skills and her stories. She works to improve at her new craft. She renews her commitment to her dream.

Following the path to your dream job or dream career will require you to say no to opportunities to return to the old place. Let me caution you, once you know where you want to go, the old place will never be acceptable to you again.

Here are 3 simple things you can do to keep your faith, ignite your passion, and not get discouraged.

1. Review your dream. It’s easy to get caught up in your day to day activities, and lose sight of the dream itself. Take the time to imagine your dream once again, in vivid technicolor detail. Allow the dream to invigorate and inspire you.
   
   
2. Ask for support. When we start to get discouraged, it’s tempting to isolate ourselves. Make a point of actively seeking support and encouragement from your support system: friends, family, a coach, anyone in your corner who has faith in you and your dreams. Ronnie turned to her coach, writing group, and her agent, to ask for the support she needed.
   
   
3. Take a bold new action toward your dream. When we start to doubt, it’s tempting to stop taking actions and steps toward our dreams, and easy to get stuck spinning in the doubts. One way out is to take bold step forward. Is there something you’ve been deferring or putting off because it seemed too scary? Do that! Ronnie’s bold move was to connect with published authors she admired. Perhaps you’ve been postponing updating your resume, or contacting someone in your network who might be able to help you. Taking a bold step forward toward your dream is a great way to disrupt the doubts and discouragement, and reconnect with your passion for your dreams.

Have you been confronted with a choice to go back to the place you left? What did you choose? How do you stay committed to your goal?

Would you share your stories with me on my blog below…

When I first met Marty, he longed to pursue a career he’d really love. He wanted a job with meaning and that felt purposeful. He knew having such a job and career would transform his life. He wanted it so . . . → Read More: Confidence for Scaredy Cats (Like Me)]]> Is lack of self-confidence the one big obstacle blocking you from doing what you love?

When I first met Marty, he longed to pursue a career he’d really love. He wanted a job with meaning and that felt purposeful. He knew having such a job and career would transform his life. He wanted it so intensely. When I asked him what prevented him from getting that, he said, “I just don’t have the self-confidence I need. How do I get that?”

My answer is this: confidence comes after you take action, not before. If you want confidence to do these things, you need take steps to get them. Marty had allowed his fears and lack of confidence in his skills and abilities to prevent him from taking action of any kind. They kept him stuck, and he wanted to be free of them.

Marty was skeptical that the answer was to take action. He was sure the way out was to make the fear go away, or wait for his confidence to build. He accused me of being too confident to understand what he was dealing with.

That’s when I shared with Marty my big secret: I am a Scaredy Cat at heart.

It’s true. Fear and worry were my constant companions. I realized this years ago. I was frustrated that others were having experiences and enjoying life in a way that I felt so far from. I had career goals, and life dreams, and I wasn’t going after any of them. Then I stumbled upon a copy of the book “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway” by Susan Jeffers. The title sums up the lesson I learned. If I was going to have the career and life I wanted, I’d have to take action even if I was scared. I decided right then I wasn’t about to let my fearful nature derail me from having the life I wanted.

So I began to practice, by taking one small risk per day. I started by talking to strangers on the street, or saying good morning to the CEO of the company. I would ask a coworker I barely knew to lunch. I also took classes in things that interested me. As long as it scared me (and wasn’t physically dangerous), it counted. Over time, I got comfortable with the feeling of fear.

Today, I view fear and worry as my friend. It’s simply the way I operate (though sometimes my friends or coach have to remind me). When I embark on a new adventure, I only get concerned if I’m not fearful. Today, others view me as confident, and some even see me as fearless. I am not fearless, I assure you. But I am confident. That confidence came from taking action and facing the fear.

So, if you are waiting for the fear to go away, and looking to build your confidence, my advice to you is that of Susan Jeffers, “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway!” Take small, consistent actions, toward what you want, and your confidence will grow.

What are you letting fear and insecurity keep you from today? Would you share that with me on my blog?

It’s possible that many of your frustrations can be dealt with by moving to a job doing work you . . . → Read More: Are you bringing these with you?]]> As you think about transitioning your career, what bad habits are you bringing with you? Do you think that if you just change jobs to a better one, all of your work problems will go away?

It’s possible that many of your frustrations can be dealt with by moving to a job doing work you love, in an environment in which you can thrive. It’s also possible that while working in your current environment you may have developed some bad habits. If left unchecked, you could inadvertently take them with you to your new environment. When that happens, it can leave you feeling very disappointed.

I have seen this happen with clients, and I have experienced it myself. I love what I do now. I spent a long time determining what my unique set of strengths and skills are, where that intersects with my passions, and what I need to thrive at work. But if I’m not careful, I can fall back into old habits of working long hours, not taking breaks, and feeling trapped.

I first discovered this one afternoon when I was sitting down for coffee with a friend. I was complaining about how much work there was to do, how exhausted I felt, and generall venting about all my worries. Suddenly, she put down her coffee cup, looked me in the eye, and said, “Lori, you are your own boss now. Why are you doing this? You know, you used to do this in your old jobs, too. If you’re not careful, you will burn yourself out, again.”

I went home and gave her comments careful thought. And I realized that I never intentionally developed new habits to go with my new career. I thought the old bad habits would just disappear, and new and better ones would automatically replace them. I began to realize that I had developed these bad habits, and carried them with me. And now it was time to replace the old habits with good ones.

Here are the signs that I experience when I fall back into old bad habits:

• working longer hours,
• skipping breaks,
• drinking more caffeine,
• worrying more,
• spending more time alone,
• focusing on the things I haven’t done,
• skipping my workouts,
• eating more junk and fewer healthy foods.

These are all clues for me. When I see these clues, I know I’m starting down the “bad habit” path. And it’s time to refocus my attention.

Here’s what I do to refocus on healthy habits:

• Structure my schedule, planning time for work and play
• Make a point to eat healthier foods, limiting caffeine and junk food
• Work out first thing in the morning
• Practice gratitude daily, listing 10 things I’m grateful for each morning
• End the day by listing my accomplishments, and express gratitude for those.

Do you have bad habits you are bringing with you? What are the signs you look for?

I invite you to share them with me on my blog.

“I am so passionate about doing this kind of work. And I know my strengths and skills make me great at this kind of work. I am . . . → Read More: Discouraged by your ideal job search?]]> I’ve noticed how frustrated and disheartened people can be by the results of their search for their ideal job. Recently, this conversation has come up again and again.

“I am so passionate about doing this kind of work. And I know my strengths and skills make me great at this kind of work. I am looking for jobs. I’m working hard. Trying so hard. It hasn’t happened yet. I thought since this is my passion, my calling, it would just fall into place. What if this is a sign that I’m wrong? Just because others find their dream jobs, doesn’t mean I will. What if it just won’t happen for me? I’m afraid I will have to give up my dream, and go back to the work I hate. What do I do?”

Have you felt this way? Perhaps you feel this way now. I know I have felt this way at times. When I went through my big career transition, there were several points along the path where I thought – I can’t make it. I am one who’s destined to be miserable in my job and career. It doesn’t matter what I do, I won’t get any results. Thankfully, I had people in my corner to help me find a different perspective. My coach provided support and practical insights. My mother shared the wisdom of her life experience. My friends listened, let me vent, then reminded me they believed in me and were in my corner.

Allow me to set the record straight. Finding a job, any job, is hard work. Period. It takes time, effort, and real commitment. You must be persistent. Looking for a job that aligns with your dream career or ideal work life is no different. It is not more work to find your dream job. It is not less work to find your dream job. It is focused and targeted work. It requires research, a strategy, and a concrete plan with scheduled steps. But the rewards are so much greater.

There is a myth out there that says once you are clear about who you are and what you offer, once you have a vivid picture in mind about what you want, it will come to you. You simply need wait for it with open arms. My experience and my own observations are that for most of us, that’s not really true. As Louis Pasteur once noted, “Did you ever observe to whom the accidents happen? Chance favors only the prepared mind.” When it comes to seeking work in your dream career, chance favors those who are making the effort.

So what can you do to find encouragement and the motivation to keep going?

1. Take a break. Go do something that refuels your energy and renews your spirit. Take a walk, do some gardening, read a book.
2. Seek support. You could get a coach, talk to a friend or family member who has been there and made it through, connect with those in your support system who believe in you and want you to succeed.
3. Don’t quit. Focus on your goal, renew your commitment, and take your next step.

You can do it. I believe in you. It may take a lot of hard work, but it will be worth it when you are working at your new dream job. For when you are working your dream job, using the strengths and skills you love to use, doing work that excites you, you will thrive.

How do you deal with your moments of discouragement or disappointment? Please share them below.

When Ron first came to me, he had worked in sales for many years. What he really . . . → Read More: 3 Key Strategies to Get Your Dream Job]]> You’ve been working hard at unearthing and verbalizing your strengths and skills. You’ve imagined a clear picture of the job you would L-O-V-E to have. Now what? How do put yourself in a position to get that job?

When Ron first came to me, he had worked in sales for many years. What he really wanted to do was teach or train adults. He actually had some relevant experience, but it wasn’t the focus of his work history. So how could he make that sort of transition? How would Ron convince any hiring manager that he had the right skills?

I showed Ron 3 key strategies that would help him to make his transition. These 3 key strategies can also take you from job-fantasy to job-reality.

1. Begin with the end in mind.

Or at least a clear picture of the job you want. Ron looked up positions that interested him, even if they were half-way around the world. (Just because it’s not in your neighborhood today, doesn’t mean there won’t be a similar opening tomorrow.) He searched to find some job descriptions, anywhere in the real world, that resonated for him. Ron then made lots of notes about the key responsibilities, skills, and experience required for the jobs he was drawn to. He paid close attention to the specific words and phrases they use. Ron then used all of this information to write up his own ideal job description, one that was based in reality.

2. Update your job search materials to target the job you want.

Ron took his resume and cover letter. He also keeps a Master Accomplishments List (insert link to post), so he pulled that out too. Ron then put these materials side by side with his ideal job description and his notes of key responsibilities, skills, and required experience. Then he updated his resume with descriptions of responsibilities and accomplishments that aligned with his target job. He rewrote portions of his resume, replacing old accomplishments with new ones that were more relevant to the position he wanted. He also added a few new responsibilities to show he had the right experience. Ron reviewed all his paper and online job search materials to make sure everything was now targeted at his new dream job.

3. Target your search.

At this point, Ron was ready to search for companies in his area that might have the type of position he wanted (even if it wasn’t open right now). He made a list of companies to target for potential employment. And then he told the people in his network that he was now actively looking for a training position. He targeted sales training and insurance training – since those were the industries he knew best. He asked for their help to find his dream job.

If this sounds like a lot of work to you, you’re right, it is. But we are talking about going after your dream job here. Isn’t that worth the extra effort? It was for Ron. And he is now happily employed in a job he loves, and is on a new career path.

Have you begun to search for your dream job? What are you looking for? How can we help you find it?

Please share your story below…

Most people who continue to work at jobs they hate have very solid, defensible reasons for staying. I know I did. In my work, I have the opportunity to talk freely and openly with individuals who truly are tired of the work they do and have . . . → Read More: 3 Reasons to Stay in a Job You Hate]]> Do you hate your job? Why do you stay?

Most people who continue to work at jobs they hate have very solid, defensible reasons for staying. I know I did. In my work, I have the opportunity to talk freely and openly with individuals who truly are tired of the work they do and have grown to hate their jobs. It’s not a conversation that’s encouraged in most places, and I consider it a privilege to have these conversations. And every one of the people I speak with has good reasons to stay.

Here are 3 common reasons that I’ve discovered, and I wonder if you can relate to any of these.

1. Money or financial security. Brad had a mortgage to pay and children to support. His family had needs he was committed to take care of. So he concluded he couldn’t quit his job. It paid well.

Few of us have the luxury of having enough money to provide for our needs and the needs of our family without working. Most of us need to earn money to pay for food on the table, a roof over our heads, doctor bills, and transportation. Things we do for fun, recreation and relaxation cost money. Money may not buy happiness, but it does provide us with a standard of living that we enjoy.

My question for Brad, is this the only job in the whole world that will pay you what you need? Is it possible there are other companies? Other jobs? Other careers? That will provide for you financially? And if it is possible, is it worth exploring for options? If you were suddenly laid off from work, I imagine pretty quickly you’d find alternatives. If that’s the case, why wait?

I do agree that before you change jobs or careers, you need to do the math. Can you make the money you truly need? I also know there are always options.

2. Not wanting to throw away all your hard work. Carrie had worked for 10 years to move herself along one career track. She was respected by her coworkers, and had done a great job. She described changing careers as though she were going to throw away all her hard – earned experience, and start over completely. She didn’t want to have all that work count for nothing. She didn’t think any of her skills would transfer to a new path.

We want our efforts and experience to count for something. That’s completely reasonable. And the good news is, it does count. When you change jobs or careers, you bring all of your knowledge and experience with you. If you don’t believe me, let me ask you, what part of your body or clothing contains your experience? Do you plan to leave that behind when you change your job or career? Of course not! You couldn’t if you wanted to! And that is GREAT NEWS! That means that wherever you go next, they will have the benefit of your unique background and experience.

3. This is what you are skilled to do. This is where your experience is.

Of course you need to be qualified for any job you seek. It can be so easy to think that our skills and experience are only valuable in the environment where we learned them. And that’s simply untrue. You may need to spend some time unearthing all the skills you have learned and the strengths you have developed in your old job or environment. But once you do, you can begin to explore where else those might be valued.

There are good reasons to stay at a job you hate. Money. Wanting your hard work to still count. Being qualified to do the job. The mistake many people make is that they stay, and stay, and stay. They don’t leave (unless forced out the door). They don’t explore their options.

It can be smart to stay at your current job, even if you hate it, until you find your next one. But to find the next one, you have to create a plan and take action on it. Unearth your skills and strengths. Imagine the type of job or career you’d love, and explore your options. Create a plan to find a new job, and make the change. Why not find a career you love and thrive there?

Do you hate your job? Why do you stay? Please share your story below.

My friend Jim was recently laid off from his job. He wanted to start looking for his next job right away, but he just couldn’t get motivated to do anything. He was hurt and angry at the company that let . . . → Read More: Burning out? 3 Strategies to Recover Starting Now]]> Are you burning out? Are you feeling like you don’t know how to stop it?

My friend Jim was recently laid off from his job. He wanted to start looking for his next job right away, but he just couldn’t get motivated to do anything. He was hurt and angry at the company that let him go. He had been working long days for months prior to the lay-off, and was physically exhausted. He felt pessimistic about his options. The last thing he wanted was to do was update his resume and start interviewing.

Jim was burnt out. He needed to deal with his burn out first, in order to replenish his energy and refresh his perspective. Perhaps you need this too.

Here are 3 critical steps that you can take to recover from burnout.

1. Focus on your health. 

Are you eating right? Are you exercising regularly? Are you getting fresh air occasionally? When we start down the path to burnout, very often self-care is one of the first things to go. That makes it one of the first things we need to restore.

Jim realized that he hadn’t been taking care of himself, and his health was starting to suffer. So he began a new workout program to get some physical exercise. He also realized he hadn’t been eating well. Now that he was home, he took over preparing meals for himself and his family. He also made a point of taking a walk after dinner with his wife. They’d just take some time to explore their neighborhood together.

2. Deal with your emotions. 

When you are burning out you can feel like you’re on an emotional roller coaster. Angry, sad, depressed, frustrated, or even numb. Ignoring these feelings doesn’t make them go away. Consider journaling about your feelings or meditating. You may even join a support group or seek the help of a therapist. Figure out what you need and who can best help you.

Jim joined a support group to process his emotions with others experiencing similar situations to his. It helped him realize he was not alone in his feelings. And he developed a new perspective on his situation.

3. Seek support to help you move forward. 

When you are ready to move forward, you may consider seeking a coach, a mentor, or therapy. Seek the support of someone who can bring a fresh perspective to your situation. Perhaps you need to request the support of your family. There are so many resources available to you. All you need to do is ask.

Jim enlisted the support of family and friends in his process. He let them know he wanted to take control of his career and to make sure his next job was a better fit for him than his last one. One of his friends referred him to a career transformation coach who could help him clarify his career goals and find the right next job for him.

Burnout is a serious thing, and if you don’t deal with it, it can make you very sick and very unhappy.

Jim was able to recover from his burnout by taking these three steps. He is now happily employed in a new job, and loves what he does. He continues his commitment to take care of his health and to seek ongoing support for his goals.

Do you need to recover from burnout? What is the next step you can take?

Kate . . . → Read More: Are you putting the cart before the horse?]]> Are you feeling like you need to get out of your current job situation? Perhaps you are employed, and feel like you don’t know how you’re going to make it just one more day. Or maybe you are between jobs, and feel like you need to get back to work immediately, if not sooner.

Kate attended one of my resume workshops. Kate hated her current job and wanted out. She would describe for everyone what she hated, why she hated it, and what she wanted to get away from. When pressed, she could list some of her strengths and interests. She knew some attributes of the environment she wanted. Though she often described them in the negative. Instead of “collaborative small teams” she would say “not competitive” and “not too big, but not working alone all the time.”

Kate wanted help with her resume, thinking if she phrased things just right, she’d attract the right job for her. The problem for Kate was she could not articulate what she wanted to move toward in her next job. She could only say what she wanted to get away from.

Kate wanted to start at the end. But the reality is there is a 3-stage process you must go through to get a job you love. You can’t skip steps; you have to complete each stage.

Stage 1 is the Unearth Stage. This is where you identify your strengths, skills, values, and passions. If you think of the search for a job and career you love as a puzzle, the Unearth Stage is where you gather up all the pieces. Put them all out on the table and turn them over (picture side up). This is where you identify what you can do, what you love to do, and where you love to do it. This is the stage where you gather them all together in one place, where you can look at them.

Stage 2 is the Imagine Stage. Once you’ve gathered all the pieces together, you start playing with how they might fit. You don’t have the box top with a picture of what the finished puzzle is supposed to look like. So you try out different combinations. You sort through all the pieces from the Unearth Stage, and begin to put together the picture of your Ideal Work Life. You decide what’s more important , what’s less important and what is irrelevant. You may end up with some extra pieces, but that’s ok. When you finish the Imagine Stage, you will have a completed puzzle picture of what your Ideal Job looks like.

Stage 3, the Create Stage, is when you will move to the practical realm. Now that you have a clear picture of what you want, you can describe what you desire to move toward. Now you can develop your own targeted job search strategy to secure the job or career you want. It will be so much easier to develop your tools: branding statement, resume, cover letter, interview prep, networking strategies, and so forth. Now you can go after the job you want.

Kate was frustrated because she hadn’t finished Stage 1, and wanted to jump right to Stage 3. That’s putting the cart before the horse. She was doing a lot of work without getting results this way. Kate was focused on leaving her current situation. By the time she completed the three stages, Unearth, Imagine, and Create, she was hot on the trail of a job she would love .

What stage are you in? Are you moving from? Or moving toward?

When you are going through a career transition, it can often seem like you’re working on a puzzle with . . . → Read More: How do you choose your next career?]]> Have you ever thought, “I know my strengths and skills. I know what I love. But how does that translate to a job or career that will support me?” Maybe you’re asking that question right now.

When you are going through a career transition, it can often seem like you’re working on a puzzle with lots of pieces. Only you don’t have the box lid with the picture on it. And for fun someone mixed in some pieces to another puzzle that don’t belong. Your job is to sort it out, find the right pieces, and put it all together. While that can be fun if you’re a puzzle person, it can also feel very frustrating when it’s your life and career. And you can feel stuck.

I have felt that way, when I was making my own career transition, moving from one career that no longer suited me, and figuring out what career fit me now. I felt the pressure of needing to get it right, so I could be earning income again. I see my clients experience this feeling as they begin the journey of transition. It’s part of the process.

My mother describes it as the time where you can’t see the forest for the trees. I find this to be a helpful analogy, because in the forest, you have a path to follow. You may not know where it leads, but there’s a path. And you can keep moving. Keep taking steps.

So what are the steps you need to take to make a choice? Once you know your strengths, skills, and are clear on what you love to do, what next? There are 3 steps to take next to make the right choice. These steps take time and effort. But they will lead you out of the forest.

1. Brainstorm all the ideas for jobs and careers you’d love. Enlist the support of friends and family, and ask what they think. Then make a list. If you get stuck for ideas, www.onetonline.org is a great free resource to help. The key here is to stay open to possibilities. Now is not the time to rule things out. Now is the time for ideas and dreams.

2. Once you have a list, you need to research the jobs to find out what they are really like. This is where you want to do some informational interviews to find out. Ask your friends and family; ask your network; find out if they know someone who has the job you want to research.

3. At this point, you will have updated your list. You will have removed jobs that aren’t as great as you thought. And you may have learned about some new ones. So now you can do some research regarding what the jobs pay and what education is required. That will eliminate more items on your list. A few resources for this are www.onetonline.org and www.indeed.com/salary. Another resource to learn about what it really takes to transition to a specific career is www.fabjobs.com.

After doing this work, you will likely have a short list. And you will be ready to choose what you want to do next, what the best fit is for you now. Your puzzle will be largely completed. And you will be ready to move on to the very practical stage of creating a plan to get there from here.

When I reached this stage I felt excited and empowered. When my clients reach this stage, they become energized to move forward. They are confident about their choice.

What step can you take today toward finding the right next job or career for you?